Tom Cruise, Sci-bot wife Katie and PR dream daughter Suri are soon to hit the road on a “no frills” camping trip. No luxury hotels or resorts for the Cruises. Nope! They are going to rough it. No word yet as to just how “rough” it will be, but I am sure it’s going to be designer tents with futons, San Pelligrino water and gourmet food. Oh and one more TINY thing I forgot to mention…

No camping trip is complete unless you bring along a “church” buddy. That’s right. Tell Father O’Malley to pack up his holy water, and bible and jump in the SUV.

Yes, Tom and Katie are bringing along a “friend” from the cult of Scientology, complete with an entire security team camped down the road, (boy I bet that security is going to really enjoy this gig). Tom got the idea to camp in this rogue fashion when he was inspired by his trip to the Brazilian outdoors in South America last year.

He states “This is what Tom wants for Suri. He doesn’t want her to miss out on the things he and Katie enjoyed as kids, just because she is growing up in the spotlight.”

Huh? He doesn’t want Suri to miss out on a NORMAL childhood? The fact that she is being taught about Xenu, literally never walks anywhere, and has a camera shoved in her face every waking moment is normal enough I guess. I am surprised he hasn’t dressed her up like a monkey and have her perform with an organ grinder for cripes sake. Apparently there’s no room in their tent for his other two kids, or as they call them the Cruise house “the non-Suris.”

Was Katie’s childhood normal? I guess growing up on the “Creek” can be considered normal in comparison to the Scientology Purification rundowns, e-meter auditing, the now confirmed alien stories (thank you Tommy Davis!) and the brainwashing that she lives with now.

Katie also has shared her love for camping by stating, “We love the outdoors. Once when we were camping Tom made his pasta carbonara for me.”

Pasta carbonara? That must be some of the “roughing” they are talking about. Back in the day, when I went camping, it was always hot dogs, Dinty Moore stew and roasted marshmallows. What was I thinking?

I can just see it now. The “three” of them, all cozy around the camp fire singing “John Jacob Xenu Heimer Schmidt” and “99 Body Thetans on the Wall” while eating niacin and oil smores. Then that wacky Tom will put a flashlight under his chin and scare little Suri with tales of how LRH traveled the globe and hiding out in his old spooky trailer from all the SP’s and creepy wogs until he dropped his body for the good of all Scientology. Good times, good times.

Of course, the crack security team will be hiding in the bushes with night goggles waiting to pounce on anything that moves. Like maybe an ALIEN!!

Hey Tom, pass the old e-meter….. it’s my turn next! Ahhh the great outdoors, KOA is in for a BIG surprise!

(Posted by Glosslip contributor “Queen”)

Source: D